Of vampires and vaccinations
6 January 2009
There is now a vaccination aimed at preventing the kind of cancer I have.
The daughter of a friend of mine asked not to have the vaccination because she is scared of needles.
Sweetheart let me tell you about needles!
I was sent to see the specialist at a clinic at the Princess Royal Hospital, as part of the process of diagnosing me, they took a routine blood test (one needle).
Having diagnosed me with cancer the specialist naturally wanted to see how extensive it was before prescribing treatment. So he sent me for an MRI scan.
This involved having an injection of contrast medium (another needle, are you keeping count?). It also involved swallowing a ridiculous amount of a vile tasting contrast medium drink both the night before and on day of scan. Contrast medium has tiny amounts of radioactivity to make guts and veins show on x-ray.
Within a week I found myself in hospital with kidney failure and very dehydrated. So they put me on a drip to give me extra fluid. That involved having a hollow plastic tube called a venflon or cannula inserted in my arm for the saline water to go through. That might not technically be a needle, but it looks like needle, and it feels just like a needle when they stick it into you (so I’m calling that needle three).
They needed to monitor my kidney function so while I was in hospital my doctors ordered a daily blood test. OK I’m losing count here, but I was in hospital about a month that time so we will say that’s getting to roughly about thirty three needles.
Most of the time blood tests in hospital are taken by phlebotomists on their regular rounds. Phlebotomists, apart from being after your blood, are generally very nice people, very skilled at their jobs, and usually manage to take a neat sample of blood on their first attempt. I affectionately call them the ‘vampires’ and I am usually very pleased to see them. I don’t LIKE having a needle stuck in me even by a phlebotomist, but if a phlebotomist comes to do a blood test at least it means that I won’t have to have a blood test taken by a doctor or nurse. On weekends or evenings doctors or nurses have to take the blood tests, they do their best not to hurt you but they don’t have nearly as much practice as the phlebotomists, and it shows.
Oh I forgot to tell you about the student doctor who attempted and failed to take a blood test seven times before I felt faint and told him to go away. (So we’ll call that about 40 needles then? No hang on the venflon needed changing a few times, better make that forty five.)
They let me out but decided I needed weekly blood tests to keep an eye on things. How many weeks are there in eighteen months? (Lemme see, seventy eightish plus the forty five, I make that around one hundred and twenty three.)
I have had at least four stent replacement operations, involving a venflon each time for anaesthetics, and several hospital visits for kidney failure involving drips and extra blood tests (so call that another twenty).
So at a conservative estimate I would say I have had a needle stuck through my skin at least one hundred and forty three times…..
No drat it… I forgot the anti nausea injections when I had the kidney failures.
A hundred and sixty ish?
Point being, if I could rewind my life to being a teenager….
And be offered a vaccination to prevent cervical cancer?
I’d be queuing up for the vaccination from six in the morning…. if only to avoid all those needles.
(My friends daughter had the vaccination, sensible girl!)
Read other posts in Val’s diary here:
2 June 2010 – Hooray for corsets
3 March 2010 – It’s your funeral
24 February 2010 – So what is a stent?
10 February 2010 – A nice cup of tea
3 February 2010 The joys of negative thinking
26 January 2010 – My secret tattoos
20 January 2010 – Plumbing problems (part II)
20 January 2010 – Plumbing problems (part I)
29 December 2009 – Beauty and fashion
17 December 2009 – How the Doctor kept me going!
11 December 2009 – Why am I not depressed?
4 December 2009 – Why I didn’t want to attend Severn Hospice!
